a tiny plastic gun is on the floor.
it is black and green,
the kind of green on military jackets and camouflage gear.
this is the kind of gun you would play with at night
when you are hiding in bushes and trees.
the gun will blend in with
the foliage and the lack of sunlight.
this is the kind of gun a child would play with.
remember when the black death killed a third of italy’s population?
the country really thrived afterwards.
we could use a new black death to clear out the dummies
in this century.
if 1 out of every 3 people i know was killed,
i would feel okay with that.
if i was the one that had to be killed,
i would film a video saying,
“i understand my sacrifice, i feel okay with this life event.”
and ask that they play it afterwards
so that everyone would know.
in 2007 this drunk guy threw up in my lap.
he had eaten seafood alfredo for dinner.
white sauce ran down my leg.
we dated for 2 years. i really loved him.
Sarah Jean Alexander is a 24 year old writer from Baltimore. She is not very good with computers. She has a cat. She is allergic to fruit. She likes top 40. She hates top 40. She has a blog. She uses twitter.